The Finkler Question.

I have no idea why Howard Jacobson’s The Finkler Question won the Man Booker Prize; it’s not just unworthy of the honor, but it’s an aggressively bad novel, hard to read (despite some strong turns of phrase), full of unlikeable characters, and populated with bad stereotypes of Jewish people and, worse, Jewishness as a whole. It is a blurry facsimile of a Philip Roth novel; it is to Portnoy’s Complaint what the new Greta Van Fleet album is to Led Zeppelin IV.

The novel revolves around three men – Julian Treslove, Sam Finkler, and Libor Sevcik – who socialize from time to time in London. Finkler and Libor are both Jews, and both somewhat recently widowed. Treslove and Finkler were schoolmates, and Sevcik was their teacher at one point. Treslove is a Gentile, and not a widower but unable to maintain a relationship, with two sons by women who’d already left him before they found out they were pregnant. And for some reason, Treslove becomes obsessed with Jewishness – not Judaism the religion, but the Jewish culture, identity, and experience. He does so just as Finkler becomes involved with a group he renames the ASHamed Jews, anti-Zionists who express their disdain for Israel’s treatment of Palestinians, and seems to be renouncing some of his Jewish heritage.

Treslove begins referring to all Jews as Finklers, which … seems problematic. It’s unclear if Jacobson meant this synecdoche as some sort of clever gimmick, but it comes off as a kind of bad stereotype, as if Finkler himself is representative of all modern Jews. Jacobson himself is Jewish and has spoken out against anti-Semitism and anti-Zionism, especially that within Jermey Corbyn’s Labour Party, so it seems wrong to ascribe a malicious motive to Jacobson here, but the device does not work in the least – it is both grating and problematic.

And I’ve discovered that I’m not the only one who thinks this – in looking for a Guardian review of the novel from when it came out in 2010, I found this editorial that expresses my feelings on how the book uses Jewish identity as a sort of running punch line to no purpose. It feels dehumanizing on the page, which makes the book a worse read both for its inherent unpleasantness and because the characters become so much less interesting.

The story itself is also just not compelling at all, with Rothian obsessions with sex and genitalia, including a bizarre passage about an older circumcised Jew trying to create a new, faux foreskin for himself. (Don’t ask. Really, just don’t ask.) Finkler was serially unfaithful to his wife, who cheated on Finkler with Treslove. Treslove himself probably can’t maintain a relationship because he can hardly distinguish between sex and intimacy. He does meet his match, which is bizarrely foreordained by a fortuneteller at the start of the novel in a plot element that just drops off the page once the prophecy is partly fulfilled, and manages to screw that up too, in large part because he becomes obsessed with her Jewishness and can’t see her as anything but Jewishness incarnate. Treslove and Finkler are both insufferable in different ways, with Finkler a bit worse for me because I have met a couple of people of whom he reminded me, but must we quibble over degrees or flavors of insufferability? You can’t anchor a novel with two nitwits like them and then expect the reader to connect with what’s happening on the page.

Yet it won the Man Booker Prize in what looks like it might have been a weak year of candidates; I had only heard of one book on the shortlist, Emma Donoghue’s Room (the basis for the movie starring Brie Larson), and one other author, Peter Carey, who has won the Booker twice already. I don’t know what the judges saw in this but I think it’s just plain dreadful, even if you give it a few points for Jacobson’s intelligent yet stolid prose.

Next up: Reading an out-of-print Graham Greene short story collection, after which I’ll read Philip K. Dick’s Our Friends from Frolix 8.

Morels app.

Morels was the first game I reviewed for Paste, over four years ago, and crossed my radar because it was a brand-new, purely two-player game with some positive early press. It’s a great, quick-to-learn set-collection game that was only the second title I’d come across to use the now-popular rolling market mechanic, where you can take the first card or few cards in the display for free, while taking cards further from the start of the queue costs you something. There’s also a push-your-luck element to choosing which sets to collect and which to discard for twigs, the game’s currency, as well as trying to deduce what your opponent might be collecting and deciding whether it’s worth using a turn to grab something they need. It’s been on every iteration of my all-time board game rankings and my top two-player games rankings since I first reviewed it.

Late last year, an app version of Morels appeared for iOS and Android devices, using the original artwork and featuring strong AI opponents – at least, I think they’re pretty strong, since I can’t beat the hard level more than about half the time – for a very strong app experience. If you’ve been looking for a new two-player game and want to try Morels before buying the physical game, or just want a new game app that plays well as a solo vs AI experience, I strongly recommend this.

Morels is a game of mushroom collection, which means a few of my closest friends are already predisposed to hate this game. The deck includes cards of nine different mushroom types, each with a different point value and value in twigs. You can ‘cook’ any set of at least three mushrooms of one type to gain the points shown on those cards by turning in the mushroom cards with a skillet card; if you turn in four, you can boost the value by 3 with a butter card, and if you turn in five, you can boost the value by 5 with a cider card. Basket cards increase your hand limit. You can turn in two cards of any mushroom type to gain twigs, which you then use to grab cards from the market that are beyond the first two (free) spots. The market moves one space to the right on every turn, and if the rightmost card wasn’t taken, it falls into a pile just off the market that can hold up to four cards, which you can also take for free; if that pile reaches four and no one has taken the stack, they’re all discarded for the remainder of the game.

There are two special card types in the deck. Destroying Angel cards are deadly, of course, and if you take one your hand limit is cut in half for several turns. Night cards show the same mushroom types as the regular (day) cards, with the exception of the most valuable cards, the morels, and Night cards are worth two cards of the displayed type – so you can turn in one Night card for twigs, or you can cook one Night card and one Day card of the same mushroom type for points. The catch is that Night cards show up face down, so you take one without knowing which mushroom type you’re getting (there’s one Night card for each non-morel mushroom). Game play continues until the deck is exhausted.

Decisions in the game are quick, but they’re not always simple; you’re working against the constraints of your hand limit, the finite supply of skillet cards, and the hard end to the game – you don’t get a last shot to cook once the deck is finished. I learned more strategy from playing against the AI than from playing against anyone in person, since the AI player nearly always does what it can to grab Night cards, even if it means using all of its twigs, and will generally try to stop me from collecting enough high-value mushrooms – particularly morels and chanterelles – to cook. The hard AI also seems to have good deck awareness, knowing what’s left and also managing end game well enough that I found I had to change how I played to keep up.

I’ve played the app dozens of times with just occasional glitches, and no complaints about game play or the AI. I wish it kept track of total wins/losses against each AI level, but that’s a minor quibble. The graphics are bright and clear, and you don’t really need to be able to read the mushroom titles to play it as a result. Everything you need to know to play the game well is on the main screen, and the challenge is more one of keeping track of things in your head (or I guess on paper, if you want) rather than one of the app making this information harder to find. At $4.99 for iOS or Android it’s an easy recommendation for me.

Eighth Grade.

Comedian Bo Burnham made his screenwriting debut with 2018’s Eighth Grade, a cute coming-of-age story with newbie Elsie Fisher in the lead role of Kayla. It will compete with itself between making you laugh and making you want to crawl out of your own skin, because I’m guessing just about everyone who sees this will relate to something that happens to Kayla as we follow her through the last few weeks of eighth grade and see her navigate social anxieties and prepare for high school. The film is free now on amazon prime.

Kayla is a shy, awkward teenager – watch how Fisher walks, as if she’s trying to make herself smaller – who posts ‘advice’ vlogs that, as we see, no one watches, but also worries that she’s giving advice she doesn’t even take herself. Nothing extraordinary happens to her for most of the film; she gets invited to a pool party, wins the dubious honor of being named quietest in her class, spends a lot of time on Instagram and Snapchat (as we’re told, nobody uses Facebook any more), has a crush, hears about sex, and eventually has a day where she shadows a perky, outgoing high school senior named Olivia (Emily Robinson, who has fantastic hair). We get a school-shooting drill, impossibly uncool teachers and school administrators – really, a principal tries to dab, and I’ve never been so embarrassed to be over the age of 20 – and, eventually, one bad thing happens that triggers the big scene you might have caught in the trailer where Kayla and her dad (Josh Hamilton) have an emotional conversation around a fire pit.

Eighth Grade is by far at its best when Kayla is on the screen and at the center of whatever’s happening. She gives a description of anxiety, without naming it as such, that’s about as good a depiction of the physical aspects of the disorder that I have heard anywhere in fiction. Fisher’s bright eyes and blond hair would seem to make her a standout, but she plays Kayla as so unsure and vulnerable that she ends up seeming younger than her classmates and that much more sympathetic. And Eighth Grade should be viewed through her lens from start to finish; even the worst thing that happens to her works better because she’s always at the focus of the narrative and the camera. There’s a joke around a banana that is such picture-perfect physical comedy that I can only assume Fisher actually hates the fruit in real life – or else she deserved a Best Actress nod for that scene alone.

Where Burnham lost me and cost himself some momentum is when he went for cheap laughs, like making the adults not just uncool but sort of assertively uncool, like the dabbing principal or the teacher in the sex education video who says “it’s gonna be lit!” To a teenager, parents and adults are just generally not cool, but Burnham goes twice as far as he needs to go so he can hammer that point home. A few of the gags hit, but more miss or just seem out of place because they take the focus away from Kayla’s journey – and her story is the heart of the film in every sense of the term.

Other than Fisher’s performance, the biggest reason Eighth Grade works, even with its inconsistencies, is that Burnham has managed to hit so many universal emotions and experiences with just a handful of anecdotes over the course of about 90 minutes. While there’s nothing here that specifically happened to me as a kid, the sensations and emotions were entirely familiar – none more so than that sense that you’re the one person in the room everyone is looking at, the one person everyone else has identified as the oddball. A few of the anecdotes are rooted in modernity; all the kids are constantly on their phones, talking to each other through DMs, snaps, and instagram comments. You can generalize almost everything in this film that Kayla experiences to match something you remember feeling as a kid. And I got to feel this film on two levels, since I’m also the father of a girl just a year younger than Kayla is, so eighth grade for us is just around the corner. (I’ve already forbidden her from using Snapchat though.) So while the script is inconsistent and has some gags that don’t land, the story is so authentic to the experience of growing up as a suburban teenager that the film eventually works and resonates without resorting to cheap manipulation or big twists.

There There.

Tommy Orange’s debut novel There There draws its title from multiple sources, including the great Radiohead song of that name and the oft-used but misunderstood Gertrude Stein quote about Oakland, which might give you some idea of how hazy and broad the novel is as a whole. With twelve central characters in a novel of a scant 290 pages – including a lot of white space – there are interesting ideas but, for readers who like to connect with characters in novels they read, not much there here.

Orange is Native American, a enrolled member of the Cheyenne and Arapaho Tribes of Oklahoma (I was ignorant of this idea of enrollment before this) and the idea of being Native American in our current society, which simultaneously fetishizes aspects of indigenous cultures while putting substantial pressure on people of Native descent to assimilate. The twelve characters in There There are connected by a complex web of biological relationships and coincidental acquaintances, all of which leads them to a major pow-wow at whatever it is we’re calling the Oakland A’s stadium right now. Several of the characters plan to rob the powwow using 3D printed guns made by yet another character, which, of course, leads to a mass shooting event that closes out the book. (That’s a spoiler, but if you don’t see that coming by everything that comes before, we may need to talk about foreshadowing.)

The characters themselves don’t get enough page time to develop any depth or to distinguish themselves from each other – it’s not always this simple, but 14-15 pages per character doesn’t give the author much time to develop them – so I had a particularly hard time keeping their relationships straight. That’s exacerbated by what I assume was a major point of Orange’s – that the fractured nature of Native Americans living in a sort of parallel or shadow world next to ours can lead to fractured family relationships. Nobody in this novel has or grew up in a nuclear two-parent home where all members were biologically related, and many were raised by someone other than a parent. In that sense, the lack of definition around the characters works in the novel’s favor, because every individual seems just a little out of focus – and from the way many of them describe their upbringings, that may also represent how they feel.

There are other elements of Native culture present in the book that didn’t make sense to me in context, although I could simply have failed to understand them because I know so little about Native traditions. Several characters report pulling spiders’ legs out of their own legs – they’ll have a wound or cyst of some sort, and then will pull strands out of them that resemble spiders’ legs. It’s the only bit of magical realism in the novel – assuming that’s what it is – and it’s never explained, eventually just disappearing without explanation. If that’s a symbol, I missed it, and yet felt like there was something significant about the descriptions that I needed to grasp to fully understand the book.

And then there’s the mass shooting, which, unfortunately, is way too familiar in contemporary fiction, which is of course an artifact of how familiar mass shootings are in American life today. The way the shooting plays out makes it feel like a jumble of knots Orange used to tie off all of the loose threads he’d created over the course of the novel, and avoids the trap of having to give each of these characters individual endings. The failure to develop any of the characters also makes the ending – some are shot, at least one dies, some do heroic things – surprisingly inert for what should be an evocative portrayal of a gigantic trauma. You should feel something when a significant named character dies on the page; I was still trying to sort out who was who, leaving me disconnected from everything that happened to them.

I heard of There There from a site that tries to predict each year’s Pulitzer winner so that collectors can try to get first editions; this was currently their most likely title to win, although I don’t believe they had last year’s winner, Less, on their board at all. (They nailed the previous year’s winner, The Underground Railroad.) Perhaps they’re right – it has been positively reviewed, and stories about Native Americans in modern America would fit the Pulitzer’s guidelines favoring stories about the American experience. It just didn’t click with me in the least.

Next up: Already more than halfway through the Booker Prize-winning novel The Finkler Question by Howard Jacobson.

Of Fathers and Sons.

This year’s slate of nominees for the Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature might have had the biggest surprise of all in its omission of Won’t You Be My Neighbor?, the rare documentary to cross over into popular success, earning over $22 million at the U.S. box office, putting it 12th all time in the category on BoxOfficeMojo. (The categorization there is itself debatable; three films in the top 11 are concert films, another is a Dinesh D’Souza propaganda piece, and two are Michael Moore propaganda pieces.)

One of the five films that did make the Oscar cut this year was the little-known Of Fathers and Sons, an Arabic-language film by the Syrian-Kurdish director Talal Derki, who was previously honored for his film Return to Homs. For Of Fathers and Sons, Derki spent over two years with a jihadist family in Syria, watching the Islamist father radicalize his sons and speak of the inevitability of a world war that leaves his particular brand of fundamentalist Sunni Islam triumphant across the world, in fulfillment of prophecy. It is harrowing and defeating, yet deeply personal, even intimate, as we watch two of the sons in particular react differently to their father’s exhortations.

Abu Osama is the father, apparently one of the founders of al-Qaida in Syria, and Derki spent those two years watching Abu Osama and his eight sons, most all of whom are named after jihadists, including his eldest, Osama Osama, and another son, Ayman Osama, named for current al-Qaida leader Ayman al-Zawahiri. The documentary has no narration, other than Derki occasionally posing questions to Abu Osama, and the only narrative arc is a natural one – the father’s indoctrination of his sons into the rhetoric and mania of a holy war against the enemies of their very specific branch of Salafi jihadist Islam (which includes pretty much everybody else, although Americans, Jews, and Shi’ites all get their turn as targets of derision). This process is set against domestic scenes, including more ordinary interactions between father and sons, as well as scenes of the boys by themselves, mostly just being boys, a strange reminder that jihadists are made, not born, and that even the father, who comes across as inhuman almost every time he speaks to the camera or to other adults, has a human side when it comes to his family. Eventually, however, the time comes for Osama to head off to training camp to become an al-Qaida fighter, while Ayman balks at the brutality of the training, and Abu Osama suffers an injury that shifts the story without deterring him from raising an army of jihadist children.

The marvel of Of Fathers and Sons is its access, apparently unfettered where the males are concerned, but with virtually no women or girls appearing on camera – the only women of any age on screen are shown at a distance in public spaces, such as outside the local school. Abu’s niece is outside at one point, never shown, when we hear the boys yelling at her that she shouldn’t be outside without her burqa, and Abu then jokes about punishing her or worse. Then we find out she’s two.

And that’s where Of Fathers and Sons becomes very uncomfortable to watch, which cuts both ways. Derki has ceded his voice to maintain access (and, perhaps, stay alive?) among men who would gladly commit murder for the sake of their very narrow beliefs. Abu has a sniper’s hideout near his house, and at one point, he and Derki are in it, when Abu seems someone on a motorbike and shoots him, gloating that the man fell off but asking someone off-camera for another gun so he can kill the man, which he doesn’t appear to do. Does Derki have any moral responsibility to say something there? Could he, without compromising his life and those of whatever crew he had? Less strident but just as disturbing is the sequence where he shows Osama, who is about 12 but whose age Abu doesn’t even know, how to shoot a pistol; with all of the kids looking younger than their stated ages, probably due to their diets, seeing a child who isn’t old enough to shave holding a pistol and shooting with an adult’s confidence while talking about God’s will and, eventually, training to fight with al-Qaida is even more disturbing to watch than the on-screen slaughter of a sheep towards the end of the movie.

I know it might sound contrarian to say this, but I’m completely fine with this getting a nomination over Won’t You Be My Neighbor?. Of Fathers and Sons has something important to say, and Derki lets the subjects say it for him. His direction feels totally hands-off, which means there are some scenes in here that might be superfluous, but do serve to fill out the picture of Abu Osama and his sons as a family who still have some bonds in common with any other family, but who live in a war zone, in dangerous conditions, and preach hate as a regular way of life. It is a story without hope, at least not for these boys, but perhaps a warning to the rest of us if we want to prevent the next generation from growing up to be jihadists too.

Music update, January 2019.

Sorry this is a bit late, but I had to write a thing about some prospects. If you can’t see the Spotify widget you can access the playlist here.

White Lies – Tokyo. If this song doesn’t put you back in 1985, I’m guessing you weren’t old enough to listen to the radio back then.

Spielbergs – Distant Star. This Norwegian trio reminds me a lot of the Wombats, if the Wombats were more punk and skipped most production values on their records, and sure enough the Spielbergs recorded their debut album, This is Not the End, at the Oslo studio of the Wombats’ bassist. It’s pop-tinged punk with just the right hardness to its edge.

Potty Mouth – 22. Potty Mouth’s 2015 single, “Cherry Picking,” was followed by a five-song EP, one more single, and then three years of silence before this track appeared a few weeks ago. It’s very much in the same vein as “Cherry Picking,” power pop with heavier distortion on the rhythm guitar, and it comes with the delightful news that the band’s sophomore album, Snafu, will arrive on March 1st.

Thrice – Hold Up A Light (Edit). The album version of this track appeared on last year’s Palms, but I’m including it here since drummer Riley is a friend of the dish and I didn’t feature this song anywhere last year.

Satin Jackets with Panama – Automatic. Panama is Australian songwriter/producer Jarrah McCleary, who’s appeared on my lists a few times in the past, primarily with his 2013 standout track “Always.” This is his collaboration with German house/disco producer Tim Bernhardt, a.k.a. Satin Jackets, although if the vocals were McCleary’s I’d believe this was a Panama solo track.

Sunflower Bean – King Of The Dudes. The title track from Sunflower Bean’s four-song EP showcases Julia Cumming’s strutting, cocky vocals, just as its lead single “Come for Me” did last fall. There’s a moment in the second verse where she sounds like she’s channeling Haley Shea of Sløtface.

Jade Bird – I Get No Joy. Bird had my #3 song of 2018 with “Love Has All Been Done Before” and is back with this track, which isn’t quite as immediately catchy but still showcases her lyric writing and her Joplinesque vocals.

Swervedriver – Good Times Are So Hard To Follow. Swervedriver’s second album into their comeback, Future Ruins, dropped last month, with three or four solid singles and then a number of longer tracks, two clocking in over six minutes, that are solid but lack hooks – good songs in between the singles. This is one of the better singles on the record albeit not up to “Mary Winter” or “The Lonely Crowd Fades in the Air.”

Teeth Of The Sea – I’d Rather, Jack (Radio Edit). Teeth of the Sea’s Master was one of my top albums of 2013, but then they put out a short album in 2015 (Highly Deadly Black Tarantula, six songs, 37 minutes) that I completely missed. They returned with a seven-minute single last year, and now have put out this more easily digested four-minute track of experimental, instrumental music, which veers from movement to movement over a dark, brooding backdrop.

Big Boi – Doin’ It (feat. Sleepy Brown). I was pleasantly surprised by this Big Boi track, maybe my favorite thing he’s done in ten years, mostly because he sounds so good here.

Foals – Exits. Foals will release two albums this year, parts 1 and 2 of a record called Everything Not Saved Will Be Lost, led off by this single, which is nearly six minutes on the album but 3:50 here. This is more “Inhaler” than “Mountain at My Gates.”

Voodoos – Natalie. These Glaswegian punk-popsters first debuted this track in 2017, but have since signed a record deal and re-recorded it; as much as I see Voodoos tabbed a punk band, this feels like it could have come from the mind of Alex Turner.

Beck – Tarantula. Beck reworked a forgettable 1982 electronica track by Colourbox (later covered and improved by This Mortal Coil) for a new album of songs “inspired” by the new film Roma, with vocal help here from Feist and Natasha Khan (a.k.a. Bat for Lashes).

Crows – Chain of Being. Signed to the new label helmed by IDLES lead singer Joe Talbot, Crows released this single of post-rock with a hint of shoegaze head of their debut album, Silver Tongues, due out later this year.

Wheel – Where the Pieces Lie. Wheel, a four-piece band based in Finland with an English lead singer, might hit the sweet spot for my taste in heavier music – the music is heavy, hard-edged, and challenging, all with clean vocals. I do have a soft spot for old-school thrash but the way Wheel’s tracks meander without abandoning their core heaviness, here most present in the chorus, is just spot on.

Astronoid – A New Color. The list gets a bit heavier the further I go; Astronoid’s music is spacier (appropriate), more psychedelic, but also bumps up against the edges of thrash or speed metal in the chorus.

Týr – Fire and Flame. Viking metal can be hit or miss, but Týr seem to get it just right – there’s something playful about their music that prevents me from feeling like we’re all taking this Viking shit a little too seriously.

Children Of Bodom – This Road. CoB might be my favorite melodic death metal band going right now; it’s difficult to create metal riffs that are catchy without sacrificing the sort of (drops voice two octaves) heaviness extreme metal fans want. There’s some pedal-point riffing in the chorus here too, punctuated by an arpeggio (maybe of artificial harmonics? I never could make those work on my guitar), that I’d like to bottle.

Dream Theater – Fall into the Light. Dream Theater are about to release their fourteenth studio album, Distance over Time, which will drop just 12 days before the thirtieth anniversary of the release of their debut record When Dream and Day Unite. This seven-minute opus, complete with acoustic interlude around the 3:20 mark, has a solid hook in the standard Dream Theater vein of progressive metal, but also reminded me of that brief halcyon moment when Metallica blew the doors off the confines of thrash and would put out songs like this, sometimes running nine minutes, with different movements and massive tempo shifts. And then they released the black album and were never heard from again. Anyway, this is a good track. Love the keyboard solo, too.

Tito and the Birds.

The Brazilian film Tito and the Birds (original title Tito e os Pássaros) was one of 25 animated titles eligible for this year’s Academy Award for Best Animated Feature Film, just now getting a release to U.S. theaters in both subtitled and English dubbed versions. It’s a visual feast with a story that is modern in details, classic in theme, and hews closely to the story templates of most animated films that try to appeal simultaneously to adult audiences and to most kids. It’s dark for its genre, but full of hope, with kids as its heroes and a simple message, cogently delivered, en route to a spectacular ending. (I saw the subtitled version.)

This year will mark the 19th time the Academy has given out a Best Animated Feature Film prize, with the number of nominees in each year tied to the number of eligible films – if fewer than 16 films are eligible, three earn nominations; otherwise, five get nods. The history of the award shows three strong biases: The Academy loves major studio releases, they prefer computer-animated films, and they strongly favor English-language films. Only one animated film that wasn’t originally written in English has won the honor (Hiyao Miyazaki’s Spirited Away won in 2002, the second year of the award); there have never been more than two nominees in languages other than English, with that last occurring in 2013 (Ernest & Celestine, which is wonderful, and Miyazaki’s The Wind Rises). The last film that wasn’t computer-animated to win was the Wallace and Gromit feature in 2005. This year’s slate of five includes two Disney/Pixar titles and one Sony Animation title, plus one co-produced by Fox Animation and Europe’s enormous Studio Babelsberg. With Mirai, a Japanese feature that wasn’t from Miyazaki or his Studio Ghibli, taking the fifth spot, the odds were stacked against Tito from the start – and then you add that the writers and directors were themselves first-timers and I don’t think this ever had a shot at a nomination. So with all of that prologue, and recognizing this hill points almost straight up, I’ll give my opinion: If Tito and the Birds wasn’t the best animated film of 2018, it was damn close, and its exclusion would be an embarrassment if the Academy were capable of that sentiment.

Tito takes place in a slightly altered version of the present, as a new pandemic begins around a disease of fear. Doctors don’t know what causes it or how it spreads, but it causes people to shrivel into shapeless blobs and, in its final and incurable stage, into rocks. The answer to the riddle of the disease seems to lie with the birds, which is where Tito and his scientist father Dr. Rufus come in; Dr. Rufus has been trying for years to build a machine to allow us to understand the language of birds, in part because he believes they are trying to warn humanity of some impending catastrophe. The machine fails and Dr. Rufus goes into exile, which leaves Tito and his friends Sarah, Buiú, and the wealthy scion Teo to try to rebuild the machine and stop the epidemic, even as Teo’s father Alaor, the film’s main antagonist, tries to stoke the fears through his television shows so he can sell real estate in his new, walled-off Dome Gardens.

Alaor is Trump, obviously – the pre-election Trump, using his platform as a reality TV celebrity to stoke fear for his own financial benefit, ignorant of or simply unsympathetic to the damage he might be wreaking on society as a whole. The disease vector is never identified in the film – this is a fear disease of fear itself, which means that Alaor can accelerate its spread by reminding people of all of the dangers in the world, foremost among which is other people. The epidemic rages as the kids work together against the city’s Gestapo-like biohazard agents and race to rebuild Dr. Rufus’ machine, failing one time after another as the disease even threatens to overtake each of them. The conclusion wasn’t what I expected – the writers had an easy way to wrap up the story, but took the long way round, and it works quite beautifully on both literal and metaphorical levels. The scripts speaks to how society should confront its fears, such as the rampant xenophobia that has infected our national dialogue, but also has a message that should resonate with anyone who’s had to cope with individual fears or anxiety.

The visuals here match up to the quality of the story, with an oil-painted look to the backgrounds that balances between impressionist and post-impressionist painting styles, including land and seascapes that reminded me of last year’s Loving Vincent, which took actual Van Gogh paintings and used them as backdrops for the entire movie. In our era of hyperrealistic computer animation, there’s a nostalgic pleasure in the exaggerated, inexact depictions of the characters themselves – Buiú in particular is my favorite, and the way he’s drawn reminded me of Jason from Home Movies. Their slapdash look contrasts well with the bold colors and huge strokes of the backgrounds when the characters are outside, complemented by the small elements on screen when the characters are indoors (e.g., the blue flame under a tea kettle).

That combination of a great story with strong animation feels like such a throwback, especially since computer-animated films dominate the box office as well as the awards in the category. (The Annie Awards split their Best Feature category in 2015, adding a category for independent animated features, and Tito and the Birds earned a nomination there, losing to Mirai.) It’s probably a matter of personal taste, but this kind of animation feels both nostalgic and yet still fresh, because there can always be something new when pen meets paper. For a film that began life as a script in 2011 and was finished in 2016-17, Tito and the Birds feels like it could have been finished yesterday, yet will remain relevant for a generation to come.

Klawchat 2/6/19.

My prospect rankings package continues its rollout this week for ESPN+ subscribers with the AL Central and AL East team-by-team reports. My ranking of all 30 farm systems went up Monday, and the top 100 went up last week.

I also have a new review up at Paste, looking at the light engine-builder Gizmos, a family-friendly game that mimics the mechanics of longer and more complex titles

Keith Law: That’s my story and I am stuck with it. Klawchat.

Trevor: KLaw – Are you at all interested in the arbitration hearings? Seems hard to believe the highest paid AAV this offseason might end up being Arenado at $26M
Keith Law: Not really interested. The clubs have plenty of money, and most players in the process are underpaid relative to their on-field worth.

Dr. Bob: You voted for Fred McGriff. He’s a ways down the list in bWAR or JAWS. Since that’s only a starting point for the discussion, what tipped it for you?
Keith Law: I didn’t vote for McGriff. I would have considered him on an unlimited ballot, but he didn’t make my 10.

addoeh: Anyone have a worse off-season than the Cubs? One of their owners is clueless and also a racist. They handled the Russell situation about as poorly as possible. They claim to have to have no budget to sign anyone. And you ranked them as having the 29th ranked farm system.
Keith Law: Other than that, it’s been a great winter on the north side.

Tyler: Hey Keith! What do you see in Taylor Trammell that puts him in your top 15 prospects in baseball? Thanks
Keith Law: I wrote an entire capsule on him, and each of the top 100 prospects, and then 14 more in the just missed column.

Anik Patel: There have been a lot of disgruntled fans when it comes to the blue jays management since AA has left. Do you feel the fans are justified or are they not looking at the big picture
Keith Law: That’s too broad a question. What are their issues? The club operating on a mid-market payroll? That’s on ownership.

Bmosc: When do you ultimately think Machado & Harper sign? Think they’res starting to sweat it out a bit at this point?
Keith Law: I would guess one or both sign in the next two weeks. Some team has to blink and realize the calendar is working against them. If the Phillies get to Opening Day with all that payroll room, the hope of contention, some bad press right now around Kapler, and neither of those two free agents, that’s a failure.

@BleedCubBlue311: Is it actually possible this late in the off-season to implement the DH in the NL?
Keith Law: I don’t think so. If I were an NL GM without an existing in-house candidate and they changed the rules now, I’d be a little miffed.

JP: has your opinion on Curt Schilling’s HOF candidacy changes over the past few years (for obvious reasons)?
Keith Law: I had said in the past I thought I would vote for him, and then when I considered his case in total this winter, I chose not to vote for him, so yes, it has changed.

Adam: Other reputable prospect outlets have more than one person working on the team and overall lists. This allows them an opportunity to compare notes and, theoretically, shrinks their error margins. Being a one man crew, how do you go about managing the workload to make sure you have the most available information and process all that feedback as accurately as possible? Do you share your list with noted friends Longenhagen and Mayo for feedback before publishing?
Keith Law: I talk to a broad range of scouts and executives and share my list with many people across baseball front offices, going through multiple iterations to get feedback before publishing. I don’t think having more people would improve the process or that it shrinks anyone’s error margins; I’ve seen lists on ‘reputable’ sites with obvious mistakes in rankings.

Michael : hey keith. really nice job on the prospect stuff over the past couple of weeks. wanted to ask you a question in re: to the team farm rankings. you’ve got miami at the bottom, but wondering how much that ranking could shift if they picked up the #50 and #100 prospects on your list for JTR. do two propects like that push them up one spot or like ten spots? thanks!
Keith Law: Maybe one or two spots, not ten spots for sure.

kc: Why do you always seem down on A’s farm? They had some guys in top 100 but you still don’t like overall.. Thx
Keith Law: Because a farm system is a lot more than guys in the top 100. Their top ten and org report will run tomorrow, and even the end of their top ten fails off very quickly, and that’s with a couple of pitchers in that top ten still on the mend from TJ.

RubenaLowe: Hey Keith, love the chats……….are the mariners prospects so bad outside of the ‘big 3’ that it couldn’t propel them to the upper half? Gilbert anything more than a backend starter?
Keith Law: I’d like to see what Gilbert looks like this year, now that he’s fully recovered from mono and in a pro system. In 2017 he looked more like a future above-average starter. But yes, the rest of the system was among the worst in baseball before those trades.

Luigi: Now that you’ve had a few months to play with it, how are you liking your Uuni pizza oven? Does its outer surface get ungodly hot?
Keith Law: I love it but haven’t used it in a few weeks because it’s just too cold outside to run in and out while cooking. The outside is way too hot to touch (yes, I’ve nicked it, and it hurts).

Jimbo: Is it fair to be down on AA as a Braves fan? Donaldson has been his most exciting move with Gausman being bumped aside in the playoffs & the Kemp deal being a creative/boring money shuffle. The prospects that are drawing praise came from previous regimes, his team couldn’t/didn’t sign Stewart. I get that the offseason has been slow for the whole league but isn’t that more reason for a mid level team like the Braves to pounce? Please tell me I’m crazy for being disappointed with it all
Keith Law: OK, you’re crazy for being disappointed with it all.

CH: Any chance Machado or Harper sit out this year? I think we’re getting there.
Keith Law: Zero.

Anthony: What do you view the likelihood that someone like George Valera ends up in the top 100 next year? Possible candidate for a Kirilloff-esque jump?
Keith Law: You could say that about many seven-figure July 2nd signings who haven’t played yet.

JR: is crappy cheap beer fighting with crappy cheap corn syrup on social media the most American thing ever?
Keith Law: Yep. I thought those ads were so very dumb. I don’t avoid Miller Lite or Coors Lite or whatever beers they were after because of their ingredients. I avoid them because they taste terrible.

Kevin: Thoughts on the news about Gabe Kapler’s time in LA with the Dodgers?
Keith Law: Not sure we actually learned anything new here – the victim didn’t report the sexual assault to the team, so while I assume she told the truth, you can’t fault the team for failing to act on information they didn’t have. What was a mistake, and deserves scrutiny, was the failure to punish the players who furnished alcohol to an underage girl (to the point that she became ill). That alone should have triggered a suspension and a police report.

Geoff: What do you make of the Reds reportedly trying to move India?
Keith Law: I had a front office executive from another team tell me flat-out they were trying to move India, and then another source told me this week they aren’t trying to move him, but that he’s the best prospect the Reds will discuss in a major deal like a Kluber trade. Senzel, Trammell, and Greene are off the table, so if you’re looking to do something big with Cincinnati, India is the best prospect remaining.

Keith: Based on yours and the other prospect lists, Nick Madrigal is one of the most divergent prospects with ranges from 15 – ~113. Is it just a disagreement over power potential or is more going on here? What should we be paying attention to as an indicator to track which way his development is going?
Keith Law: No reputable list has him top 20; the highest I’ve seen is 41. He’s a very small second baseman without power projection. Tough to profile that guy as an above-average regular.

Claus: Does Luis Garcia (Nationals) have the tools and upside to jump into your top 100 list in 2020? If so, what would he need to improve on?
Keith Law: No, probably not.

Teddy Ballgame: how would you resolve the reliever parade problem in baseball? Do you even see it as a problem? Shoukd MLB be trying to get away from one out relievers because it’s a bad viewer experience? Do you miss pinch hitters like I
Keith Law: My issue with one-batter relievers is less aesthetics and more practical: If every pitching change means a commercial break, and MLB won’t shrink commercial breaks, then we need fewer pitching changes.

Troy: Dubon anything more than utility guy?
Keith Law: Could be a regular at 2b. I wouldn’t count him out.

Anik Patel: Why is Cleveland not going for another run into the playoffs? I understand the payroll is an issue but they have subtracted quite a bit from their lineup when they are clearly the strongest team in the AL central
Keith Law: I think they view the division as winnable without upgrades. I’m not sure I agree, and they should certainly be trying to upgrade their OF.

Mike: Given his injury history is it time to consider Jonathon Loaisiga a full time reliever or is it best to still try and develop him has a starter?
Keith Law: Still has the stuff to start, and they could use him in that role.

Allan: The Rockies have baffled me by not allowing McMahon or Tapia to consistently play in the majors. What is going on in the FO?
Keith Law: I’m afraid they’ll block Rodgers too. I don’t know what their philosophy is on these players.

JP: is Clint Frazier an everyday LF for a contending club? he can still fake CF?
Keith Law: He’s never been able to play CF.

javier: who needs harper/machado more: a team in a championship window now like the cubs, phillies or a team multiple pieces away like wsox/padres who normally dont have a shot for top FA competing with yankees/boston/etc
Keith Law: I think the Phillies have to get one of those two guys. Otherwise, what’s the point of clearing all that payroll?

FiveForFighting: If you are a team like the White Sox whose window of contention probably isn’t open yet, do you pursue a Harper or a Machado even if signing them to a long-term deal includes an opt-out after, say, Year 2 or Year 3?
Keith Law: If the AAV is low enough, sure. And they could contend this year with one of those guys, maybe adding a starter, and then one hopes some big leaps from young guys already in place. I said before they’re not that far off from contention.

Pat D: As a diehard Yankees fan, I keep an interest in prospects who they trade or lose. Luis Torrens’ situation fascinates me. Can he ever be a viable major leaguer? If not, what would you say ruined him more, the shoulder injury or being stashed on San Diego’s roster the whole season?
Keith Law: The shoulder injury. I’ve heard positive things from last year, to the point where he might resurface as at least a quality backup.

AGirlHasNoName: All that off-season stuff about the Cubs being true, would you still bet against them winning a tough division this year?
Keith Law: Are you asking me Cubs vs the NL Central field? I’ll take the field.

Nathan: You’re invited to a friend’s house. While there, they suggest a game of Monopoly while listening to Bruce Springsteen’s entire collection. Do you A) grit your teeth and bear it B) politely decline C) offer a different suggestion D) find a new friend
Keith Law: D.

Willie Dewit: Is it possible for you to hate a TV show, band, or movie but at the same time realize you are the minority and it’s probably pretty good? Game of Thones, U2 and Dances w Wolves for me.
Keith Law: Sure. Much of what we think of art is subjective. People whose opinions I respect think Breaking Bad is one of the greatest TV shows of all time. I don’t see the appeal.

Anik Patel: Thoughts on Auston Matthews signing a 5 year extension?
Keith Law: I had to look to see if the Rays had given Austin Meadows a five-year extension. Apparently this person plays hockey.

Santiago: Hey Keith, Orioles fan here. What are your thoughts on Grayson Rodriguez?
Keith Law: Orioles team report went up Tuesday and he is mentioned at lenght.

Jerry: Do you see Alvarez as another potential 1B bust for the Astros along the lines of Singleton and AJ Reed?
Keith Law: Singleton is in his own category of bust, for largely non-baseball reasons. Could Alvarez fail to hit MLB pitching like Reed has (in limited trials)? Sure. He’s not very athletic, 1b only and not good there, and I do have concerns about his future hit tool.

Erik: what’s the ETA on Wander Franco with the caveat the Rays will probably want him to “work on his defense”
Keith Law: I said in his capsule he could see the majors before he’s 20.

Mike: You read Ken Rosenthal’s latest on rule changes? Are you a fan of universal DH? Pitch clock? What about forcing pitchers to face 3 batters?
Keith Law: Yes on universal DH. Hard no on pitch clock. A two-batter minimum would probably serve the same purpose.

Geoff: T/F: Spending money is the new market inefficiency.
Keith Law: Kind of true. I believe too many teams are concerned with getting a “good deal” rather than considering whether a contract could provide sufficient ROI by the player getting you to the postseason, which gives a large revenue bump.

John: Tyler O’Neill and Dakota Hudson for Corey Kluber? Fair or Indians need more?
Keith Law: Cleveland would laugh at that.

Ben : Why is the HOF ballot limited to 10 votes? If you think a person is a HOF’er should it matter if there are 10 more qualified candidates?
Keith Law: Ask* the Hall of Fame. Their call, not the writers’. (*Typo fixed!)

EuanDewar: Do you enjoy Cormac McCarthy’s work and are there any authors in that vein you’d suggest to check out next?
Keith Law: Yes, I liked Blood Meridian and the Road (well, ‘liked’ might be the wrong word there) quite a bit. If you like his settings, you might read Lonesome Dove, but I think McCarthy’s gift is in exploring the darkest sides of human nature, which would point to noir writers like James Cain or Jim Thompson.

xxx(yyy): do you have a go to polenta recipe?
Keith Law: I use Alton Brown’s basic recipe – start with a diced onion sweated in some olive oil, add 4 parts liquid to 1 part polenta, cook in a 350 oven for 35 minutes, stirring a few times, and then finish with 2-3 Tbsp butter and up to 1 cup grated Parmiggiano-Reggiano.

Bmosc: As a fellow coffee aficionado, do you buy your beans locally or online, and if online, who is your go-to vendor?
Keith Law: I get a lot of coffee locally from Royal Mile and Re-Animator, and also buy coffee when I travel.

Ben : I’m surprised the Red Sox farm system isn’t competing with the Orioles for the worst in the league!!
Keith Law: I see more upside of guys already in that system than I do of guys in the O’s system.

Chip Dipson: What are your thoughts on Willie Calhoun? Might he still be a useful major leaguer, even without a defensive home?
Keith Law: Useful, yes, definitely. Not sure he’s a regular, and very low chance he’s more than that. That’s why he didn’t make the top 100 before 2018.

Phil: Who has the higher upside between Dustin May, Mitchell White and Dennis Santana?
Keith Law: Only one of them made my top 100…

Chris: Didn’t find Yordan Alvarez any of your lists. What’s your thoughts on him? Too risky of a hitting profile given he’s not a great defender?
Keith Law: See above. “Not a great defender” is kind. Might be a DH. Not an elite hitter, either.

Jamison: Why wouldn’t the Cubs be in on Harper or Machado?
Keith Law: Because they have no mo…. no mone… sorry, i just can’t say it without laughing.

Keone Kela: Odds of Taylor Hearn being able to stick in the rotation long-term?
Keith Law: Nonzero, but low, maybe 20%.

Dr. Bob: Key line from Michael Baumann in Ringer RE: Kapler: “Despite MLB’s efforts to combat domestic violence and sexual assault within the sport, its response to stories that involve violence against women tends to concern the player first. What can the player learn? Is he sorry? When can he return to the field? Perhaps there’s a suspension, maybe an apology, but the needs of the survivor usually take a back seat to the need of the sport to put the matter behind it.” I think you have been beating this drum as well. We all need to.
Keith Law: I agree with all of that. It’s the wrong way to think about crimes against women. And the fact that one of the players involved in the underage drinking incident was a significant prospect should have no impact on how the team or league handles such a matter, but in this case it is indisputable that it did.

Jason: Do you think Carson Fulmer could become a late-inning reliever? Feel like he could use a change of scenery.
Keith Law: Only been saying that since he was in high school.

Jerry: BR Pythagorean says 2018 Astros underachieved by 6 games. Only Astros regular who may have had a career year was Bregman. Assuming nothing catastrophic, is anything less than 100 wins a disappointing 2019?
Keith Law: You should never bank on 100+ wins as a threshold for success; it takes some good fortune to get there. If they win the division, and they should, then be happy.

Lester: Do you think Ronny Mauricio has a greater than 50 percent chance of sticking at SS in a vacuum? Not sure how that changes in a system with Amed and Gimenez.
Keith Law: Yes.

AGirlHasNoName: No, I am asking if you had to pick one team to win that division, would you pick the Cubs? Maybe a 35% chance, but still better than Brewers or Cardinals.
Keith Law: Yes, right now I’d give the Cubs the highest odds of the five teams, but certainly under 50%.

Pat D: My mother told me she was having a back and forth discussion with a friend over last night’s SOTU and her friend said it was much better to listen to Trump than “the traitor Obama.” I told her to unfriend that person, even without asking her to defend that statement because that person is clearly delusional. Agree?
Keith Law: Yes. You can’t reason with the irrational.

JG: Thank you for the write up on the AL Central prospects. For the Twins, you like Enlow as a potential #2 or #3 if he develops??
Keith Law: Yes, either.

Macey: You just had your first typo I’ve ever seen.
Keith Law: Well now I have to go find and fix it.

Rick Sanchez: Adell appears to be in a similar spot to Moncada a few years back as an uber-athlete with contact and pitch recognition issues. Do you see Adell overcoming those issues and reaching star status?
Keith Law: Not similar at all. Adell’s issues are a function of youth and inexperience.

Brad: Could Cionel Perez factor into the Astros rotation this year?
Keith Law: In theory, yes, but I think he’s behind too many other guys – maybe 8th or 9th on the depth chart right now.

Dan: Are there any foods you just won’t make because their too time-consuming/not worth the effort? I’m about to give up making sourdough bread from starter because it never turns out well and it takes days from start to finish with the slow proofing and starter feeding.
Keith Law: Sure. Even things I love making, like fresh pasta, are once in a blue moon items because of the time required (and the mess … oh god, there is flour everywhere).

Bill: Not a ?
Keith Law: Not an answer.

77Sticks: There seems to be a growing critique that writers shouldn’t analyze free agent signings as good or bad — that doing so takes a pro-management view, and thus is inherently anti-labor, and ignores the fact that owners are billionaires who can afford these contracts. Do you plan on dialing back your criticism or analysis in that regard?
Keith Law: No, because I don’t think that criticism has merit.

Nolan: Let’s say the Padres sign Harper. What would you do then about the *checks notes* 7 outfielders projected to be on the opening day roster? (those seven, as a refresher: Harper, Myers, Margot, Cordero, Reyes, Renfroe, Jankowski)
Keith Law: Of that group, only Margot really has to be there, because he can play centerfield (and does it well), and Harper’s presence isn’t related to that. None of the rest matter if you think you can sign Harper.

Bill: Just wanted you to hear i pay for espn bc of your content exclusively….also have purchased quite a few board games based on your reviews. Please keep doing what you are doing.
Keith Law: Thank you. That’s very kind of you.

Chris: Have you played any gloomhaven?
Keith Law: No, I don’t play role-playing games.

Mike : How do you feel about the DH being in the National League as quick as this year ?
Keith Law: Again, I favor it, but this year is going to be too soon.

Pierre: Pete Alonso 30 hrs over under?
Keith Law: He could do it. I’d guess under, but hardly shocked if he gets to 30.

Dave: Not sure if you can/want to talk about it but I have seen writers I respect sing the praises of Idelson. I know part of the problem is dealing with the Board, etc. but allowing a Board member to use company e-mail for statement is a big no-no. Committee stacking for the Baines vote. I really think the HOF needs someone who can lead in the future.
Keith Law: I have gotten along well with Jeff when we’ve interacted, but I’m glad to see the potential for a change here, for the reasons you identified. If the writers are going to choose the Hall of Famers, then let the writers choose the Hall of Famers. Don’t game ballot rules to try to prevent Bonds and Clemens from getting in. Don’t stack committees to get certain players in.

CH: Do you think MIA is getting weak-ish offers for Realmuto bc they said yes to nothing for Yelich? Can Brinson recover at all from LY?
Keith Law: I think they’re getting lower offers than they expected because teams value framing now and Realmuto is not a good framer.

Pierre: Justin Dunn in mariners rotation 2nd half ?
Keith Law: Unlikely. Maybe a September callup.

Doug: Padre fans are in love with Franmil Reyes? Can he repeat his success with the bat from last year? Any possible growth? Or a regression candidate? Thanks!
Keith Law: With his approach I don’t think there’s growth ahead.

Macey: Why do you think the Trump scandals don’t really stick? His family was proven to have cheated on hundreds of millions in taxes and it’s probably something 98% of people haven’t even heard of. Is everyone just waiting on Mueller or is it a bed of needles situation? It’s really the most amazing thing about him, how he gets away with so much.
Keith Law: It’s clear that maybe 30% of voters wouldn’t care what he did, because they favor policies he and the modern GOP support (which I think veer from many GOP platforms of previous generations).

JR: I understand teams looking for a deal, but are you surprised by the complete lack of discussion on some guys? Have you heard Keuchel or Adam Jones names associated with any team? MLBtraderumors twitter account used to be a must pay attention too everyday for chatter, but there is almost no talk on some guys. It’s weird.
Keith Law: Jones wasn’t on my top 50 free agents – he hasn’t been a productive regular in several years. Lack of a market for him disappoints me, as I like Jones the person quite a bit, but I am not surprised. Keuchel’s lack of a market surprises me since he was one of the best starters available. Even if there are durability questions, he’d help a lot of contenders right now.

Doug: Michael Baez a reliever for you? Assuming I will find out the answer in 4 days.
Keith Law: There’s a much higher belief across the industry this year that he’s a reliever than there was a year ago.

laney adams: Brandon Lowe seems like a very good and underrated prospect. Do you think he wins the 2b job or splits time in OF?
Keith Law: I want him to win the 2b job. He’s their best internal option.

Roberto Kelly: Do you see these old posts from millennials who called everything “gay” in the early 2000s coming back to ruin their careers? And what is being done in the present day that we might deem problematic 30 years from now?
Keith Law: The cases I’ve seen have gone past people just using the word “gay;” those same people have used a slur against gays that starts with f (which, helpfully, comes in three- and six-letter variations!). That word was never okay, in any context. If that’s on your twitter feed, even from ten years ago, delete it. Just search your own name and those words and delete all such posts.

lurs darkvert: How do the Reds eventually solve the PT with Winker and Kemp? Logically wouldn’t you want to give the most PT to the younger and much more talented player
Keith Law: I’d play Winker and bench Kemp until there’s a need for him. Seemed to me like they added his contract to make the deal happen and so the Dodgers would take Bailey back.

Mark: Do you think what Josh Bell has shown so far is what he is?
Keith Law: There is raw power in there he has yet to show in games.

Chris J: Just for the sake of context and comparisons – if you expected Kieboom to be at least passable defensively at SS, what sort of a range might he have fallen in your top 100? Thanks, Keith!
Keith Law: Higher, but where depends on what kind of defensive SS I thought he was. As it is, I see zero chance he’s a regular at short in the majors.

John: Did you see Bill DeWitt’s comment to the STL PD regarding players not being signed? “It’s not like people are hoarding money and making a lot of money in this business” That’s an exact quote. That’s so insulting to us fans.
Keith Law: It’s just plain false. I hope the paper pointed out the inaccuracy of the claim.

Darren: If you were just hired to be GM of the Rockies and were stuck with D Murphy at 1B, whom would you want to get the every day at bats at 2B. Hampson or McMahon?
Keith Law: I don’t think McMahon’s going to be a very good defender at second, or even an adequate one. I’d probably play Hampson there and find a way to get McMahon more AB at first.

Oscar Proud: Should Northam resign?
Keith Law: Absolutely.

Ben: What do you think of Schultz not wanting to be called a “billionaire” but rather a “person of means”? Do you think the wealthy should pay more taxes in this country?
Keith Law: Taxing wealth is complicated – you can move wealth, and you can hide it. Taxing income is more straightforward and easier to police.

Josh: Not a question, just really love seeing you dunk on Twitter folks that try to drag you over things that they clearly can’t comprehend and resort to petty insults (that are usually inaccurate). Keep it up!
Keith Law: Just another free service I offer.

Chris J: On Adam Jones – do you think there is any hesitation from some teams based on Jones’s willingness to speak out on certain topics?
Keith Law: Not at all.

xxx(yyy): where do you go to find good longform articles? right now i use some combo of The Sunday Longread (Don Van Natta Jr) and digg.com (reinvented from what it used to be)
Keith Law: I get them from lots of sources. You’ll notice I often link to longreads published in the Guardian, and some from longreads.com.

Mark: I recently re-watched Eddie Murphy Raw (might have been Delirious) and couldn’t believe how many times he dropped the 6 letter version of the F word. And he became a star of children’s movies, now his career would be over before it started.
Keith Law: Yeah, Delirious was, at its time, a seminal comedy album, one that helped make him a superstar and I think defined comic sensibilities for a large swath of listeners. (I knew much of that set by heart from listening to it so many times.) It is absolutely beyond the pale today – the gay-bashing is intolerable, both the use of the f-word as a slur and the entire attitude towards gays as freaks or deviants or simply objects of derision.

Matt: Do you think the Phillies should fire Kapler given the recent news from his time in L.A.?
Keith Law: No, not based on what I know about the situation.

Andy: Should capital gains be taxed at the same rate as income? I have an econ degree and I really don’t know the correct answer to this.
Keith Law: I don’t think there is a correct answer. Lowering the rate was supposed to spur investment and thus economic growth. I think it spurred investment but drove wealth (via cap gains) for a small percentage of the population, rather than growing the larger economy in a way that would benefit all strata.

Matt: I think a big issue that people miss with regards to wealth is that billionaires don’t actually have cash. Like Schultz doesn’t have billions sitting in a bank. It’s all in stock. So it’s harder to tax that unless he cashes the stock out.
Keith Law: Also true. If he cashes it out and spends it, there should be tax revenue from whatever he purchases.

Ridley Kemp: The New Yorker’s review of Roma dinged the film because Cuarón didn’t provide enough context for American viewers. Is that a legit complaint, or should the reviewer have perhaps taken their own lack of knowledge as a cue to pick up an effing book and learn a thing or two? (not that I have strong opinions on this or anything)
Keith Law: That’s a bad take. I’m surprised the New Yorker of all publications would run that.

Darren: Keith, I have a request. I know you are tough on ranking 1B due to defense and replacement level, but they provide a lot of offensive value. Would you be willing to add a top 10 1B/DH list of prospects based on offensive capability alone. It would be a golden nugget of an article for your fans that play fantasy baseball. Much Appreciated.
Keith Law: I appreciate the request, but I’m done writing for now. As far as ESPN is concerned, I’m on vacation for the next week.

Pat: Not hating, just curious. You had Diaz top 50 midseason and then dropped him 70+ spots. What could have possibly changed so much from July until now? Or am I thinking about this in the wrong way?
Keith Law: You are thinking about this the wrong way. The lists are not sequential; they are organic, and I build them from scratch each winter.

Lyle: Your board games list is for 2-hour or less games (and I understand your reasoning) but do you have any favorite games that are in the 4-hour (or more) range?
Keith Law: No. A four hour game is work.

Blackface was common in the 80s: I lived in the south, but am from the north. I had colleagues and friends who were reporters, attorneys and in one case a social worker who wore blackface to parties. I would never have done so … but I’m not fast to judge them now, 35 years later.
Keith Law: I am. I’ve said this before, but I remember an episode of a bad TV sitcom, Gimme a Break!, that explained why blackface was wrong – the youngest daughter dressed up Joey Lawrence’s character with blackface, and the late Nell Harper (an African-American actress) dressed her down for it by saying (paraphrasing) “I never thought I’d see the day when I heard you say the word n—–.” That had to be around 1985, on a major American television network. So don’t fucking tell me you didn’t know it was wrong, because I am not here for that bullshit.

DR: Why build annual lists from scratch each year rather than look at them as (shudders) “living” lists? Is this a conscious decision? I see each having pros/cons
Keith Law: They’re not living lists. Do you really want me to skew a list because I don’t want to drop a player by more than X spots, even if in my view and the industry’s the player’s value has changed by far more than that?
Keith Law: The point is to give you the most accurate list I can compile, using my own evaluations and those of industry sources I trust, that represents the players as they stand right now.

Greg: Ever been to Buffalo ? Any place to eat you really liked?
Keith Law: Yes, one spot I remember – a diner, maybe the Lake Effect Diner? Really good.

Adam: Hey man. No question here, just thanks for doing this. It’s clear you appreciate the people who read your work.
Keith Law: I do, thank you. I understand some people choose not to pay for my work, and that is their right, but I want to try to honor people who do make that choice and enable me to do this for a living. I appreciate all of you who shell out some of your cash to read my words and hear my thoughts. That is why this prospect rankings package gets longer and more detailed every year – the more I can deliver to readers, the better the chance you’ll believe you got your money’s worth.
Keith Law: That’s all for this week, but before I sign off, some quick administrative notes. I’m doing a Reddit AMA tomorrow on r/baseball at 1 pm ET. I may sneak in a Periscope as well, as long as I get a few things done before then. The team-by-team reports will run one division a day through Sunday. I’m taking a trip to visit friends in LA, so I will be less available on Twitter than normal, and may skip this week’s links roundup as well, although I expect to post other content to the dish. (I’ll still be posting nonsense on Instagram, as usual). Thank you all, as always, for your questions and for reading.

Cork Dork.

Bianca Bosker’s Cork Dork: A Wine-Fueled Adventure Among the Obsessive Sommeliers, Big Bottle Hunters, and Rogue Scientists Who Taught Me to Live for Taste is experiential non-fiction that manages to maintain its balance even when the author might have had trouble maintaining hers. She took a year to try to prepare for and pass a sommelier exam, something that would normally take three years, and along the way learned about the science of taste and smell, experienced the strange subcultures of sommeliers and wine snobs, and drank a tremendous amount of wine. A good friend of mine who worked in one of the restaurants mentioned in the book recommended it to me a year or so ago, and it’s both entertaining and, since I knew and still know very little about wine, informative.

Bosker went from writing about technology to complete immersion in the wine world to prepare for that exam and write this book, which meant learning a lot of about wine – its history, its manufacture, its varieties – and the restaurant culture around wine as well. Sommeliers are expected to be experts in wine, people who know everything on the wine list and can recommend bottles to customers based on their tastes and on what food the customers wish to order, but who are also there to sell wine; alcohol is often, perhaps nearly always, the biggest profit center for any restaurant that sells it. The sommelier exam involves not only identifying wines during a blind tasting, but a test of service, with a judge pretending to be a difficult customer and judging the candidate on physical service and how well the candidate answers questions.

To speed up the process, Bosker throws herself into the work of learning how to identify wines, including visits to researchers in olfactory science – by far the book’s most interesting section, as she explains how olfaction (smell) was long denigrated as the least important sense and one unworthy of serious scientific study. You may already know that most of what we classify as “taste,” whether for food or for libations, is actually smell, and that the traditional “taste map” of the tongue is so much hot garbage, a relic from pre-scientific ideas of anatomy. How wine is served – in what vessels, at what temperature – affects what chemicals escape from the wine and make it into our noses for our brains to identify, and thus how we perceive the wine’s flavors. To learn these scents, she bought a kit to better train her nose, which is a thing I did not realize you could do – in fact, people with olfactory deficiencies can improve their senses of smell by, of all things, practice. (I passed this along to Will Leitch, who lost his sense of smell to a childhood illness, and he expressed the understandable concern of regaining something he has no real memory of having.)

Bosker does gloss over one significant question that still dogs the world of wine, from sommeliers to independent wine criticism, although she mentions it in passing numerous times. There are many experts, including a handful of economists like Princeton’s Orley Ashenfelter, who developed a formula based on weather data that predicted Robert Parker’s famous wine scores, who say wine reviews and evaluations are largely bullshit. Wines are among the most chemically complex things we consume, with hundreds of chemicals responsible for the array of aromas that produce the ‘notes’ experts profess to find in wine – although Bosker concedes that some of these notes are pretentious folderol made up to impress consumers. The debate is whether anyone can train their noses and palates to detect so many different notes in a few sips and sniffs of any bottle. You could ascertain this via mass spectrometry, and the knowledge of the aromas produced by specific chemicals in wine as led to an entire industry of factory-produced wines that are assembled additive by additive. Can experts actually discern these? I’m doubtful; Bosker doesn’t delve into this deeply enough.

That skepticism colored my reading of anything in Cork Dork pertaining to the exams, whether the basic sommelier’s exam she takes or the master sommelier exam that made the news last year when one of the judges leaked answers to the tasting portion. Are we testing something real? How much of these results represent actual skill in wine detection, and how much is just good guessing? And how much do we need to know or understand to just enjoy wine? The same characteristics that distinguish wines grown in different terroirs in different seasons can also appear in coffee and chocolate, two products I particularly enjoy, but identifying the different notes in a single-origin coffee doesn’t make me appreciate the cup any more. Perhaps I’m just an oeno-philistine, but as much as I liked Cork Dork, I also found myself shaking my head at the hoops through which Bosker and other wine geeks had to leap to get that sommelier certification – and still don’t know to what extent that test actually measures something real.

Next up: I just started Tommy Orange’s novel There There, which I’ve seen mentioned as a potential Pulitzer Prize for Fiction winner this year and is indeed named after the Radiohead song.

Stick to baseball, 2/2/19.

My ranking of the top 100 prospects in baseball ran this week, with four separate pieces: #1 through #50, #51 through #100, my column of fourteen more guys who just missed, and a ranking of the top 20 prospects just for impact in 2019. I also held a Klawchat on Wednesday and a Periscope video chat on Thursday.

My ranking of all 30 farm systems will run on Monday, February 4th, after which the team by team reports will run, one division per day for the following six days. I’ve written 24 of the 30 team reports so far, if you’re curious.

Many thanks to the White Sox blog SouthSideSox and writer katiesphil for this lovely review of Smart Baseball.

And now, the links…